Proactively waiting

proactive waiting blog photo


“The sea does not reward those who are too anxious, too greedy, or too impatient.  One should lie empty, open, choiceless as a beach—waiting for a gift from the sea.”

—Anne Morrow Lindbergh, author of Gifts From The Sea

Sometimes we feel we hit a wall when we have done everything we know how to do to make something happen and yet our outer circumstances have yet to change.

The challenge is accepting that we do not always get to control the schedule of when our next opportunities—whether they are new relationships or job possibilities—will appear.

Instead, these waiting periods often require that we surrender to a power beyond ourselves and deepen our faith, trusting all will be fine in right timing.

I am currently in that state of surrender, knowing I have done my part in creating the inner mindset and marketing foundation for attracting the finances to produce my new book.  A number of synchronistic events continue to appear around my book, reminding me that the Universe is partnered with me on this dream—even though it is not working as fast as I would like to bring the results I want.

Each delay reminds me that there is another piece of knowledge I still need to absorb, or a new life lesson to integrate, before moving forward.   I know when I am truly ready to stand up and deliver my powerful work to the masses the right resources will align with me.

Having coached clients in transition for more than 21 years, I understand that “the neutral zone” space between one job, opportunity or relationship and the next is often the hardest stage of change to endure, although it is often the most fruitful.  That “void” where nothing seems to be happening is actually where we get time to shift patterns from the past and become very clear about our needs and wants going forward.

Some people benefit by using to this “in-between” time to fully grieve losses and all they are letting go of before they can step into a new identity or new life.  Others may need this waiting time for self-reflection, to evaluate how they may want to be different in the world, or with those they love, going forward.

To eliminate any neediness and urgency about the timing of a new life unfolding, I am practicing what I call “proactively waiting.”

Rather than sit anxiously waiting for responses from investors, philanthropists and publishers, I have committed to a temporary, full-time job for two months working in a boat yard as a dispatcher.  The skill set required to do this fast-paced, detail-oriented job is vastly different than using soulful, reflective time to write divinely inspired blogs and book content.  I am totally out of my comfort zone working with Act! sales software and Excel spreadsheets, coordinating boat launches with low and high tides, and assigning the right size tractor and trailer to the appropriate sail and power boats.

The first week I came home crying every night.  Still, my intuition and down-on-my-knees prayers delivered me this job on a day when I knew I had to strengthen my sense of security and connection to continue working on my book in a joyful manner.

Other ways I practice “proactively waiting” include:

  • Being sure that at the first sign of a downward spiral of despair or panic that I intentionally shift the energy by going for a walk, calling a friend, or praying.  We have 10 seconds to shift out of a negative thought before it sends us in an unfulfilling direction.
  • Reading books that inspire or uplift me.
  • Repeating a positive, loving word about myself out loud.
  • Visualizing the expected outcome (and best to do this for at least 16 seconds to 7 minutes a day).

In truth, I also know as ready as I think I am to produce my book on self-love and self-care, I am also honoring a commitment I made to myself.  This dream will be delivered with a team behind me.  I am still putting the members in place and also seeing who comes to me in supportive ways.

Like Anne Murrow Lindbergh says in the introductory quote to this blog, a certain openness is required for us to receive a gift from the sea.

Umm…I wonder if there is another reason I am working in a job I would have never looked for (it came to me) near the sea at a boat haul marine service company.


1.    I allow myself to trust in the timing of my next steps.

2.    I allow myself to proactively use my waiting time to serve me in other ways.

3.    I allow myself to shift negative thoughts by speaking as lovingly as possible, especially during the “void” times when I feel most unsure about myself.

Beth Shedds’ photo of Crane Beach in the winter shows the beautiful “void” that leads us toward the path of our dreams. Beth recently launched her own “dream” and you can learn more about it at

COMING NEXT WEEK:  A special guest blogger who will share some wise relationship insights.




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  • This is so timely, I am blocked as well and need to gently wait for the next step in my goal. I’ve been reading Tarot cards and pulled The Moon card in a reading for a friend, it showed a time of uncertainty, of not being able to trust one’s intuition, confusion. The sale of her house has fallen thru three times! We both got the Movement Rune in reverse today showing a time of non-action. Someone is trying to tell us something….

    • Gail Kauranen Jones says:

      Gail: I am glad the timeliness of my blog was able to help you through your own blocks. Thanks for sharing. To quote a quote my mom used to tell me, “It’s always darkest before the dawn.” I believe many of us healers are on the brink of something big, as the world needs our skills very much right now. Gail

  • Dick Joseph says:

    Hi Gail,

    Every business owner goes through these periods when we think that the world is conspiring against us to keep our egos in check, keep us broke or teach us humility. Like you said, it can be either the time that breaks you or it can be a time that you can learn how to approach things differently. Great advice – as usual. It will all come together for you, Gail. Hey, learning how to do Excel spreadsheets is not a bad thing!! Take care.


    • Gail Kauranen Jones says:


      You are so right. The entrepreneurial life certainly brings us to the line many times and in many ways, especially when we are solo breadwinners. And, it also offers us the flexibility to live our life differently. I chose this lifestyle to be present to my children. I was always able to be there for them growing up. I have no regrets. Now, I am trusting this lifestyle will support my book dream as I inspire others to live in great health. I bet I will need those Excel skills to manage all the opportunities that will soon be coming my way:). Gail

  • Sandra says:

    Dear Gail,
    You are a very special person with so many skills. Hang in there. I believe your time will come, but in the meantime you continue to survive. And yes, you are being challenged in many ways. Your strength and motivation will get you through. You are a winner. Hugs, Sandra

    • Gail Kauranen Jones says:

      Sandra: I appreciate your care, support and belief in me as a winner. I am staying committed to my book dream and feeling the love and support of all who have seen me through many challenges. To thriving, Gail:)

  • Maria says:

    Awesome blog Gail! As I read your blog, one of the quotes from A.A. popped into mind, “Let Go and Let God.” Fully surrendering to God is not an easy thing, but it is something I have learned to do. Yes, I still have days when it is hard, but I have friends that gently remind me to keep the faith. When I include God in my every day life, the day does go a lot better. Patience is another thing we need to develop because things “WILL” happen in God’s time, not ours.

    • Gail Kauranen Jones says:

      Thanks, Maria, for sharing the importance of faith in your life. And as you noted, patience is a skill to develop during the “waiting periods” of life. Still, we can move forward, even when feeling stuck, by treating ourselves kindly and reminding ourselves of our innate value regardless of external circumstances. “Voids” are a great time to rewire our brains for increased feelings of self-love, which is why we must consistently monitor our inner chatter in compassionate ways. Gail

  • Marta says:

    Hi Gail-
    I loved loved loved loved your blog post this morning. You are a prolific writer. Thank you for your continued inspiration, motivation and dedication. I can be guilty of impatiently waiting, but was reminded just recently that sometimes patiently waiting in faith is the best option.

    • Gail Kauranen Jones says:

      Marta: So happy my blog touched a special place in you (and thanks for your compliments on my writing). It is so wonderful to hear from you and get that the update that your patience in waiting is paying off. Congrats!!!! I look forward to hearing more. Gail

  • Rich Moore says:

    Your wisdom here, Gail, is spot on!

    I’ve always been a big believer that people make their own luck, that it’s up to the individual to go make something good happen. At the same time, I long ago started believing that everything happens for a reason. Many times, and maybe even most times, those reasons are not clear. But sometimes, when we’re really, really lucky, the reason lands in our laps and somehow things in the world suddenly make sense and make us feel better and more in control.

    Here’s an example: a good friend and former employee at our marketing firm recently interviewed for a senior position at a larger agency, one where I had highly recommended her. Through an unfortunate and honest misstep in email (she sent a follow up note to a person at the agency that interviewed her, addressing it to the wrong first name), she didn’t get the job. Purely because of that misstep. She was crushed. It was an absolutely awesome job. Her confidence tanked.

    Three weeks later she was hired for an even better position at a far more progressive agency, one that had an account that she would lead and couldn’t be more ideal for her. It has her engaged deeply in the art world, which is her passion. She got the job, and was/is over the moon excited about it. But, she would never have landed this job if she hadn’t whiffed on the prior one. At the end of the day, she was painfully reminded — slow down!

    I know that’s a long winded example, but it’s one that points out well that things happen for a reason.

    Your point about proactively waiting comes in to play when you marry ‘things happen for a reason’ and my feelings that people need to go out there a make something happen.

    In trying to make something good happen, we sometimes push and push and feel like it’s just not happening, we’re not making any progress.

    This is when I say you have to recognize when to stop pushing: sometimes you’ve done all you can do, and you just need to let up, stop pushing, give things time to evolve and settle in, let things develop, let it happen. Maybe even do something else for a while.

    It seems counter intuitive, but it sure seems like sometimes you just have to take a break and wait, not complacently or irresponsibly, but as Gail recommends, ‘proactively!’

    Gail, I’m envisioning a ‘Proactively Waiting’ book by you sitting on the shelf right next to Sylvia Boornstein’s ‘Don’t Just Do Something, Sit There.’

    • Gail Kauranen Jones says:

      Rich: I love your insights and your story about your good friend/former employee–such a great example of “more waiting” working out for the best. Thanks so much for sharing and inspiring my readers to believe, as you say, that everything happens for a reason. And you WILL see my book on your shelf next to Sylvia’s, but it may have a different name:). Great to hear from you, too, after all these years…and still feel “aligned.” My best to you and yours, Gail.

  • Gail, through all your challenges you are still able to see the “gift” of even your disappointments. I hope you realize how incredible that is. How incredible YOU are.
    Thank you for your powerful insights and sharing.

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