The Goldenness of Silence

“Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.”

–Anais Nin

In times of life when I am shifting between states—from joy to temporary sorrow or grief, for example—I have increasingly learned to welcome silence as my guide.

Initially agonizing if there is a painful emotion I do not want to feel, I have increasingly learned that if I can be quiet, I will release more quickly and gently the angst I feel. Then, like being embraced by a warm, golden glow or a giant, affectionate hug, I acquire much soothing wisdom to carry me forth in loving ways.

If I push too quickly from one emotion to the other as I used to do in younger years, the negative one I avoided feeling will come back to haunt me later. It shows up when I get easily triggered by an event that did not warrant my reaction or response. Or, I get anxious, which is always a cue to me that something needs to be felt, said or physically released through exercise– preferably by taking a simple walk on a beach where I listen more carefully to my hurt, anger, frustration or disappointment.

I am currently in a quiet time, ushering in a renewed state of contentment, where I am tapping into some dreams and goals with greater clarity and discernment. All around me I have pasted words that enliven me to live, love and work bigger than I ever have before. The energy within my office is exciting.

Whispers of hope abound, as friends have emailed me loving messages, sent cards and flowers, all in recognition of a brave choice I made to be by myself a bit more versus with a partner.

Centered and relishing solitude, I am becoming further strengthened in my core. The love I am and have shared with others is always there for me. Silence has partnered with me in continuing to embrace it.

(A special thanks to Beth Scanzani for her gorgeous swan photo which helped me center more into the peace of “becoming”)


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  • Beth says:


    Reading this is makes me feel so calm and nurtured. I have the sense of relaxing into my self in a place of knowing trust and self care. Your writing is beautiful, as always. And, your vulnerability and willingness to stay with…and see the gifts in…your feelings, is an important reminder for so many of us who try to wiggle and squirm out of those places as quickly as we can.

    And, of course, the photo is just perfect ; )


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