The one shift that can change your life


“Choosing compassion over judgment expands our lives and hearts.”—Gail Kauranen Jones, Coach, Author and Wellness Pioneer


Many of us, knowingly or unknowingly, judge others upon meeting them. Often those judgments are based on past conditioning and have nothing to do with present reality.

For example, have you ever not liked somebody and were not sure why? Then, hours later, you remember he or she reminded you of someone from the past who may have hurt you or been unkind in some way? Hence, your judgment was only a projection of an old belief and not truly representative of the new person placed before you.

Consistently, I have become aware that each time I let go of judgment, I find a new gift. Sometimes, I go the extra mile and silently bless those who seem harsh or unkind. Other times, the people who I thought were most unlike me have become my friends. The diversity expanded my life, rather than shrunk it.

We grow by experiencing another’s worldview of life. By taking the time to be present, just listening and remaining in a state of wonder, we can receive incredibly inspiring insights from others.

Each of us has a story, or a wound from the past, that can get triggered by new connections we meet. If you find yourself racing to judgment, try pausing, centering in yourself, and sending compassion to those placed in front of you.

If you feel hurt by another, you may try what I do: I get down on my knees and pray to forgive those who attacked, criticized, ignored, dismissed or misjudged me. I also pray to be forgiven for the times I have done the same to others.

And don’t forget to give that same compassion to yourself that you extend to others. Sometimes the voices inside our heads are more critical than any external comments we hear. One of the most powerful books for increasing our sense of love and worth, which I referenced before in my blogs, is Self-Compassion…The Proven Power of Being Kind To Yourself.

Together–for ourselves, others and this world we share–can we approach each other with more kindness and gentleness and less harsh judgment? Discernment is important, but so is love.

When in doubt, ask: What would love do here? See how your world changes!

With compassion,


I recently purchased the canvas photo of the magenta tulips pictured above, drawn to both the color and the flowers reaching up, which represents to me expansive joy. I later learned that magenta is a color of universal love, a perfect message to go with this blog post. I am placing the canvas on the walls of my new writer’s home for the summer by Cave Creek/Carefree, AZ.


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  • Lisa Langaker says:

    WOW – what a powerful blog! I’m super convicted. If more people did the simple steps that you just outlined above, the whole world could be changed. Gail you have amazing insight and your words are so encouraging and full of HOPE!

    • Gail Kauranen Jones says:

      Living from love and teaching HOPE and worthiness is my life purpose, Lisa–the calling that came from a scary health challenge. So glad you appreciate the lessons I’m sharing. Blessings, Gail

  • Thanks, Gail, beautiful post. Compassion for others, especially those that we do not like, is a gift that enables us to be liberated and totally in our own power. I just love the way you have explained it. Thanks, with love, Michael

    • Gail Kauranen Jones says:

      Thanks, Michael-I’m learning more and more that love is a discipline that deepens with conscious awareness and practice. Compassion is a great starting point! With love and gratitude, Gail

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